Hilarious jokes provide boundless laughter and endless amusement. Whether you’re in need of a quick mood lifter or a hearty chuckle, hilariously funny jokes will tickle your funny bone and leave you grinning from ear to ear.
Also, the benefits of laughter extend beyond mere amusement. Scientifically proven to reduce stress, boost mood, and even strengthen social bonds, laughter is strong medicine. From witty one-liners, funny punchlines to clever quips, these hilarious jokes will make you laugh out loud and spread joy
Table of Contents
Hilariously Funny Jokes
What falls, but never needs a bandage? The rain.
I was going to tell you a joke about boxing but I forgot the punch line.
Why don’t scientists trust atoms anymore? Because they make up everything!
I’m not a fan of spring cleaning. Let’s be honest, I’m not into summer, fall, or winter cleaning either.
Why did the egg hide? It was a little chicken.
Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks!
What did the dirt say to the rain? If you keep this up, my name will be mud!
Why couldn’t the sunflower ride its bike? It lost its petals.
What’s an egg’s favorite vacation spot? New Yolk City.
I asked my computer for a joke, but it just gave me a hard drive.
I ate a sock yesterday. It was very time-consuming.
What kind of candy do astronauts like? Mars bars.
I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down! Also, I already told you tomorrow.
I wanted to buy some camo pants but couldn’t find any.
I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I’ll let you know.
What do ghosts say when they get into their car? ‘Boo-kle up!’
What month is the shortest of the year? May, it only has three letters.
What did the snail who was riding on the turtle’s back say? Wheeeee!
Why did the vampire go to the doctor? He was coffin.
I was going to tell a time traveling joke, but you guys didn’t like it.
What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
How many actors does it take to change a light bulb? Just one. They don’t like to share the spotlight.
I used to run a dating service for chickens, but I was struggling to make hens meet.
Why do we tell actors to “break a leg?” Because every play has a cast.
Why do mathematicians hate the U.S.? Because it’s indivisible.
What does a pig put on dry skin? Oinkment.
What do you call it when a snowman throws a tantrum? A meltdown.
My uncle named his dogs Timex and Rolex. They’re his watch dogs.
Why did the old man fall in the well? Because he couldn’t see that well!
Did you hear about the guy whose left side was cut off? He’s all right now.
How do you open a banana? With a mon-key.
If you try to fail, and succeed, which one did you actually do?
Which is faster, hot or cold? Hot, because you can catch cold.
What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner’s on me.
Why do oranges wear sunscreen? So they don’t peel.
Why did the sun go to school? To get a little brighter!
My wife told me to stop acting like a flamingo, so I had to put my foot down.
What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
Why was the book upset? Because it had too many problems.
Where does Batman go to the bathroom? The batroom.
These hilarious jokes are sure to bring a smile to your face and maybe even a hearty laugh. Remember, the best jokes are the ones shared with friends, so feel free to pass these along!
Funniest Jokes to Tell
What do you call a pony with a sore throat? A little horse.
What do you call an alligator in a vest? An in-vest-igator!
What did the left eye say to the right eye? Between you and me, something smells.
What did the mama tomato say to the baby tomato? Catch up!
Why do elephants paint their toenails red? So they can hide in cherry trees. Ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree? Works, doesn’t it?
Why didn’t the melons get married? Because they cantaloupe.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
What’s a fish’s favorite instrument? The bass guitar!
How did the pig get to the hogspital? In a hambulance.
I’m so good at sleeping I can do it with my eyes closed!
Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he had a great fall.
How do pirates prefer to communicate? Aye to aye!
What happens when a strawberry gets run over crossing the street? Traffic jam.
Why did the cow jump over the moon? The farmer had cold hands.
Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open!
A termite walks into a bar and says, “So, is the bar tender here?”
How does an octopus go into battle? Well-armed.
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
What do you call a pudgy psychic? A four-chin teller.
What do you get when you mix a cocker spaniel, a poodle, and a ghost? A cocker-poodle boo.
How do celebrities stay cool? They have many fans.
I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
What does a pickle say when he wants to play cards? “Dill me in!”
How much money does a pirate pay for corn? A buccaneer.
I told my computer I needed a break, and it replied, “You and me both!”
Where do young trees go to learn? Elementree school.
Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use a honeycomb.
Why do dogs always race to the door when the bell rings? It’s hardly ever for them!
How did the student feel when he learned about electricity? Totally shocked.
What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A Maybe.
Why are books no good at entering competitions? Because they always end up getting judged by their cover.
Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7-8-9.
Why don’t atoms ever trust each other? They make up everything… even the calories!
If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims.
I tried to catch fog yesterday. Mist.
What do you call a hippie’s wife? Mississippi.
Why did the sun go to art school? Because it wanted to be a star!
Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was a-salted.
How can you tell it’s a dogwood tree? By the bark.
What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
Humor has a wonderful way of bringing people together and turning even the dullest day around. Hopefully, these jokes add a little laughter to your day!
Hilarious Try Not To Laugh Jokes
What did the buffalo say when his kid went to college? Bison.
What did the mayonnaise say when the refrigerator door was opened? Close the door, I’m dressing.
What’s the stinkiest planet? Poopiter.
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
What did one wall say to the other? I’ll meet you at the corner.
Why don’t sharks eat clowns? Because they taste funny.
I asked my pizza to make me a joke. It gave me a cheesy one, but the delivery was perfect.
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Why the long face?”
What did the pirate say when he turned 80? Aye matey.
Why don’t secret agents sleep? Because they’re always undercover.
What’s black and white and goes round and round? A penguin in the washing machine.
How do you organize a space party? You planet.
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.
Did you hear the rumor about butter? Well, I’m not going to spread it.
Why did the student eat his homework? Because his teacher told him it was a piece of cake.
What did one hat say to the other? You wait here, I’ll go on ahead.
Why don’t ghosts like rain? It dampens their spirits!
What do you call a dinosaur that crashes his car? Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.
I couldn’t figure out why the baseball kept getting larger. Then it hit me.
What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.
Why did the snowman turn down a cup of tea? He was worried he’d melt under the pressure.
What did the full glass say to the empty glass? You look drunk.
How do you stop a bull from charging? Cancel its credit card.
Why don’t we see elephants hiding in trees? Because they’re really good at it.
What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One’s pretty heavy and the other’s a little lighter.
Did you hear the one about the roof? Never mind, it’s over your head.
I used to hate facial hair…but then it grew on me.
A cheese factory exploded in France. Da brie was everywhere.
What’s a ninja’s favorite type of shoes? Sneakers.
What’s the best smelling insect? A deodor-ant.
What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear.
Why was the coach yelling at the vending machine? He wanted his quarter back.
